With young children, everything is simple – they usually want the same thing as their parents. It is important for a child to get the approval of mom and dad. However, in adolescence, the situation changes dramatically. The teenager seeks to realize his desires. At the same time, parental motivation is often rejected, and one’s own has not yet been formed. A mature child ceases to be interested in anything, does not want to do anything. How to overcome the stubbornness of a teenager and help him move in the right direction?
In adolescence, the child wants to break free. This explains the aggressive behavior towards adults. Sometimes violent resistance is not groundless. A common situation: parents through the child are trying to realize their unfulfilled dreams. Mom wanted to become a violinist – “Go, baby, to a music school.” Dad in his youth did not receive a sports category – “Son, I enrolled you in the section.” Moreover, if the child suddenly does not justify the hopes of the parents – “We do everything for you, but you …”.
A teenager faces a difficult choice: live at the behest of adults, lose his own individuality, or go into conflict with the closest people. How to be?
Show love and support
It is wrong to praise a son or daughter only for good grades and achievements in sports. Most likely, the child does not see and does not feel your love. This is not surprising: you yourself are pushing the child to the idea that he is loved only for impeccable studies and other victories. Be sure to tell the teenager how much you appreciate his human qualities, appearance, tastes. Don’t be afraid to show your feelings. Even if compliments cause resistance on the part of the child, this will definitely have a positive effect on his self-esteem.
Be loyal to the hormonal changes that occur in the body of a teenager during puberty. Remember how difficult transitional age can be. Be patient and make sure that the diet of a growing son or daughter is complete. Lack of will, laziness, and fatigue may indicate a lack of any substances.
Don’t raise your voice
Shutterstock
Accusations and threats will not add motivation to the child. Learn to hear and listen to the child, respect his point of view, even if you do not agree.
Pay attention to the interests and desires of the child
Does a teenager share his dreams with you? Or did you yourself notice his passion for something? Encourage your son or daughter to take action, or subtly suggest your own pastime options.
Don’t judge
Predicting a nightmare future for a child because of today’s difficulties, you completely kill his self-confidence. No one has yet become a drug addict or a murderer because they got bad grades in exams or dropped out of music school.
