What men are still allowed to say now

Actually, gender-equitable behavior is very simple. An anti-sexism guide for those in a hurry.

“Woman overlooks the end of the lane and drives into a construction site – two injured”, was the headline of the Berliner Zeitung on July 27, 2020. Can you read the sexism out of the headline? Right, neither do I. But AfD politician Lindemann has a particularly trained eye and has interpreted the end of the lane as a clear sign of #gendergaga. The Twitter community thanked him.

He must have had words like students in his head, which are now called gender-neutral students. But in the case of the “end of the lane”, the projection was more likely the father of the thought. Or the mother? Oh whatever. At least the example shows that there is confusion. What is gender equitable, what is sexist?

Basically we can say: sexism is a historical relic. For centuries people have been denied brains, logic or the ability to park because of their gender. Most of the time, women were disadvantaged, excluded from schools, universities and governments. And yes, women are also sexist if, for example, they prefer to be led by bosses and attribute more competence to them than bosses, as studies show.

Tips against the “annoying topic” feminism and #metoo

Why are we that? Because we learned from childhood that the older man is usually the boss. Or teachers take girls less into math. Or at the family celebration, instead of being praised for her clever answer for her pretty dress. We learn these mechanisms unconsciously and in search of recognition.

And yes, there are really outdated educational principles for boys and men too, à la “An Indian knows no pain”. But that is another topic that can be discussed elsewhere.

So it’s really nobody’s fault. But we are all guilty if we just carry on as before. I can already hear the protests: What do women actually want? They are fine here! You should take a look at other states! We have had this discussion since the 1970s!

Short guide against sexism

Yeah, annoying. Probably all feminists, humanists, and everyone who wants to live fair to one another think so. It would be nicer if the topic was through. There are a few easy ways to put an end to this. To do this, we just have to actively use our intellect and our ability to reflect. Nothing easier than this? Let’s go! The anti-sexism guide for those in a hurry.

1. Open eyes. What is everyday life like for women? As for men? Why are my friends afraid of walking home alone at night? Who gets more money for what reason? Who says more in the meeting and why? Just take a look and record unrated.
2. I’m not sexist! Maybe. After all, we are also unconsciously racist. So it doesn’t hurt to examine yourself critically: How do I behave? Where are my limits in my head? The following story provides a brief test. A man and his son are in the car and have a serious accident. You come to the hospital and all the doctors are in ongoing operations. Except for the chief doctor. He goes to the operating room, sees the boy, and says: I can’t operate on him. He is my son. Why? The answer is simple: the mother is the chief physician. But the male-dominated language creates images of men in the head. As a result, most people are confused at first.
3. Am I not allowed to say anything more? But! And live with the consequences. We have a fundamental right to freedom of expression. However, according to the Basic Law §5, this right finds its “limits in the provisions of general laws [..] and in the right to personal honor.” Of course, this is legally flexible. But in the office, it should be clear that respectful interaction is desired. So the limit to freedom of expression is where the other person’s honor begins. A trick: maybe you can think for two seconds longer before saying something. Just imagine your mother standing next to you. Would you then trumpet this saying too? No? Then it might be more for the beer evening than for the work environment.
   Specifically, it means, for example, to refrain from saying anything about the body parts of colleagues. To leave the room when someone is judged or condemned because of their gender. Those who are brave enough can also verbally slide in between.
4. But I was only kidding! That’s ok, but not a free pass for rowdy behavior. Jokes and humor are great. They make us laugh, reduce stress and make work easier. But jokes work about relationships too. So there is a difference between jokes that you tell your best friends over a beer or the boss in the hallway.